Mutilated Valentine!!!

I sent out Valentines this year to about 25 people all across the US. They were candy Valentines, and I put them in small envelopes affixed with $0.41 stamps and brought them to the post office. I had a feeling that the single stamp wouldn't be enough to deliver them, since they were heavy with the candy. The nice man at the post office informed me that because of their thickness the envelopes would get stuck in the mail sorting machines. I would have to send each as a small parcel.

"No problem", I thought, and I told the man that would be fine. He then needed to add postage to the 25 parcels and stamp each with "Parcel Post." He had to do this ONE AT A TIME instead of just printing out 25 identical postage stickers. He then proceeded to key in the zip codes on all 25 parcels. "Still fine", I thought. All said and done it was about $1.13 to mail each Valentine, and the process at the post office took about 30 minutes.

Well, Valentine's Day came and went...and I got word from a few friends thanking me for the Valentines. For example, I know one made it to Boston, and another to LA. Still, I was surprised by the lack of response. That was until yesterday when this came returned to me in the mail:


Yup, a mutilated, and de-candied Valentine (recipient name and address have been obscured to protect the innocent). According to the accompanying note, it arrived in Santa Anna, CA missing its contents. Now, if I hadn't have sent the Valentines as parcel post, the damage could be explained by the sorting machine describe by my friendly post office employee. But this was a small parcel...no machine. To be honest, it looks more like a small animal got hold of it than anything else. My favorite part of the accompanying note is where it says "We realize your mail is important to you and that you have every right to expect it to be delivered intact and in good condition." I'd settle for poor condition, as my mail certainly isn't "intact."

So this is the dilemma: How now do I distinguish between the ungrateful Valentine recipients (and think twice about sending them Valentine's next year at $1.13 postage, lol) and those whose Valentines were unceremoniously destroyed en route? My friends talk to each other too. I hope no one thinks I intentionally left them off my Valentine's Day list! The real kicker is that this exact thing has happened in the past with candy Valentines that I've sent. A few years ago, someone I had sent a Valentine to received an empty, mutilated envelope 2 or 3 months AFTER Valentine's Day. And the true irony here: it was the same person who's mutilated, empty Valentine got returned to me yesterday.